4 Things To Know About Adolescent Anxiety

Anxiety is like fire: it can keep us safe and warm, or completely devastate our property and our lives. It’s good to be a little anxious at times. When walking in a deserted parking lot at night, anxiety keeps us on alert and ready to take fight or flight should a dangerous situation arise.

But for many people, especially adolescents and teens, anxiety can become the norm instead of the exception. And even more, anxiety can become contagious in adolescence. Just walking into a classroom or being with a group of people they don’t know can be a crisis situation for a teen. And sadly, the more adolescents and teens experience these ‘scary’ events, the more anxiety becomes a chronic condition.

Here are four things parents and teachers should know about adolescent and teen anxiety:

Anxiety Refers To Physical Symptoms Associated With Negative Thoughts

Negative thoughts such as, “no one will like me,” or “everyone is going to think I’m stupid” come first. These thoughts are then followed by physical symptoms such as a stomach ache, diarrhea, or shaking and shallow breathing. Adolescents and teens need to learn how to not only shift their thinking (“This will feel awkward but I’ll be OK”), but also cope with the physical stress (take slow, deep breaths). This will help them learn that they can handle uncomfortable feelings instead of avoiding them. Furthermore it will help boost confidence and self-esteem which will further contribute to a decrease in anxiety symptoms.

Dealing With Anxiety Requires Problem Solving Skills

Life is full of uncertainties and gray areas. The role of parents of young children is to help them navigate through these situations. But adolescents and teens must be equipped with problem-solving skills so they can tolerate uncertainty instead of avoiding it, as avoidance only makes things worse and gives our fears more power.

For younger kids, anxiety can feel isolating and lonely. It’s easy for kids to fall into the trap of, “No one knows what this feels like” or “You don’t understand.” Be honest with your kids. Tell them you know what it’s like to have anxious thoughts and feelings. Share with them how you have handled it.

Above all, whatever you do, DO NOT say things like, “Don’t be silly. There’s nothing to be anxious about.” This is one of the worst things you can say to an anxious adolescent or teen.

The Adolescent Mind Is More Sensitive To Environmental Stress

The adolescent and teen mind is a jumble of chemical changes that can make any situation seem like time spent in a fun house. These hormonal changes make adolescence an extremely challenging time to cope with anxiety — both for parents and the children! Be aware of these environmental stressors in your child’s life. Plan and prepare for them. Talk about them ahead of time with your child. Talk about strategies and tips to handle anxious feelings when they arise.

Anxiety Is A Vicious Cycle

When teens and adolescents are anxious, it’s easy for the adults around them to become anxious as a response. And vice versa! But, the more anxious parents and teachers are, the more controlling and inflexible they may become. So it’s important to be aware of your emotional response and check in with yourself to be sure your reaction is loving, validating, and supportive. Not rigid, judgmental, and insensitive.

Watching your child suffer with anxiety (or anything) is the worst. With the proper knowledge and skill set, suffering is completely unnecessary and there are ways you can help them.

James Killian, LPC is the Principal Therapist & Owner of Arcadian Counseling in New Haven, CT where they specialize in helping over-thinkers, high achievers, and perfectionists reduce stress, increase fulfillment and enhance performance so they can move From Surviving To Thriving.